I can't get myself going today. It is one thing to take time off, like yesterday. I lounged in the zero-gravity recliner on the shady lawn, enjoying the warm breeze, reading and napping. It was well-deserved and much enjoyed.
It is quite something else to have an unscheduled day, tons of things to do, and fritter the time away by flitting restlessly from one unfinished task to another. Not much is getting accomplished but I am not enjoying it either. I can't stand myself when I do that.
Excuses range from the weather (sultry with frustrated thunderstorms and smoky from forest fires) and the stars (Moon in late Gemini square transiting Venus and my natal Neptune) to plugged-up swimmers' ears that make me feel as if I am underwater. But really, one has choices. I feel energetic enough, I just can't seem to settle down. The computer is on the outside table. The Multiply inbox and Facebook are exerting a magnetic pull.
The question arises: When one says "I can't get myself going", who is the real self? The taskmaster or the rebel?
In the world of psychology much has been made of the virtues of being in touch with one's Inner Child. Quite frankly, my inner child has more or less run the show ever since I left home at age 18. What I need is a better relationship with the Inner Accountant.
Thank goodness it is Market Day tomorrow so I have to get going, in the mood or not. Some of us just function better with a small amount of outside pressure.